top of page

Psychology of Relationships

Relationships are important. Time is short. Get it right.

  • Writer's pictureGary W. Lewandowski Jr.

Sustainable Marriage Quiz

Updated: Feb 12

In a previous article, Rekindle Your Romance with Self-Expansion, I wrote about the importance of self-expansion model for relationship development. (Interested in the research behind the scale? Read Stronger Than You Think: The 10 Blind Spots that Undermine Your Relationship...and How to See Past Them)

How does your relationship stack up?

Not Very Much 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Very Much

  1. How much does being with your partner result in your having new experiences?

  2. When you are with your partner, do you feel a greater awareness of things because of him or her?

  3. How much does your partner increase your ability to accomplish new things?

  4. How much does your partner help to expand your sense of the kind of person you are?

  5. How much do you see your partner as a way to expand your own capabilities?

  6. How much do your partner’s strengths as a person (skills, abilities, etc.) compensate for some of your own weaknesses as a person?

  7. How much do you feel that you have a larger perspective on things because of your partner?

  8. How much has being with your partner resulted in your learning new things?

  9. How much has knowing your partner made you a better person?

  10. How much does your partner increase your knowledge?



60 and above — Highly Expansive. You are gaining a lot of new experiences and reaching new goals as a result of your relationship. Chances are you have a happier, more sustainable relationship as a result.

45 to 59 — Moderately Exciting. Your relationship has led to moderate improvements in your life and some new experiences. But there’s definitely room for improvement.

Below 45 — Low Connection. Your relationship is not creating opportunities that help expand your knowledge and make you feel better about yourself. Make an effort to share new experiences with your partner to improve your relationship.

The Sustainable Marriage Quiz was originally posted on Tara Parker-Pope’s New York Times Well Blog. For additional information, please check out “The Happy Marriage is the ‘Me’ Marriage” This quiz is for personal use only. For educational/research use, please contact Dr. Lewandowski at Other use of this material may be prohibited by law.

Bình luận

bottom of page